back to center

It’s funny how easily I still find myself getting thrown off center… a gentle reminder not to fall into the illusion that the work is done, that I have reached some sort of finish line in the race to wholeness.  The external world has a way of throwing darts into my internal landscape – muddying the waters, clouding vision, stirring confusion, fear, shame, doubt… putting the resilience and self-love that I have laid claim to up to the test.

And yet, I notice that the pendulum doesn’t swing as far to one side as it used to.  The trail of breadcrumbs back to self has laid a clear path to follow, even if sometimes it is a long journey.  The heart-space has a greater capacity to hold all of this.  The many tools I have gathered over the years sit firmly in my tool belt, ready for a quick draw when I need them.  It’s no longer a game of seeking and grasping, but one of remembering and connecting.

Continuing to lay the foundations of home within myself… remembering to act with loving kindness, compassion, gentleness and patience, moving through the process with grace.  Strong, yes, but also soft, tender.  Remembering that some days will be easier than others… that the rainbow comes only after the rain.  And knowing that I am a vast canvas on which to paint an ever evolving work of art.

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