on giving love

There are so many ways that we hold back love. It is a treasure stowed safely in our hearts, for fear that letting it flow freely in its fullest expression means imminent suffering.  It may end, it may not be returned, it may make us look foolish and naive.  We keep it locked up and disperse it in small and safe doses, carefully calculating the risk and reward of every morsel that is parceled out.

But let’s face it – we are dying to love and be loved.  When we are standing in its warm radiance, we feel connected, whole, and witnessed just as we are. It calls us into sharp presence and invites us to dance with our vulnerability. It is the ultimate teacher, the ultimate healer, the balm that eases the deepest aches. It is no wonder there is so much fear connected to the possibility of its loss – there is no greater pain than that of the loss of love, and this fear leaves us either clinging tightly and possessively to the love we have, or we avoid opening to it altogether.

Every relationship you have in this life will end.  Every one.  Every family tie, every friendship, every lover, every twin flame and soul mate. Our spirits inhabit these animal bodies for a fleeting moment in time. Everything is constantly changing, evolving, dying, birthing.  Who knows how long any of us have? There is no time to save up all your love for The One – the one who will stay forever, the one who will always love you back, the one who will never hurt you. Run your fingers across the battle wounds on your tender heart and feel the ley lines of your resilience. There is room for your heart to love, and break, and love again. There is room for it to be loved in return again and again. It can hold a a greater capacity than you give it credit for. You are strong enough to be soft.

Loving deeply means grieving deeply. The depth of our love mirrors the depth of our grief, and while suffering may be a choice, pain is inevitable. Can you open up to love anyway?  Can you hold your boundaries strong enough for you to give it fully, passionately, and unapologetically, whether or not anyone is willing to receive it?  Can you love yourself harder than you’ve ever loved anyone or anything before? Can you stop playing it safe and let love ravage you in all its beauty and chaos? Can you embody it in the face of this crazy world? Let it be your most precious gift and sacred offering. This world is starving for your love. Give it fiercely, fully, fearlessly, give it now.

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